What to Pray for if the Taliban (or any Extremist) Ever Detains Anna Hampton (A Tribute to Jim Law)

Family isn’t always blood. It’s the people in your life who want you in theirs. The ones who accept you for who you are. The ones who would do anything to see you smile and who love you no matter what.

RIP Jim Law

There are many serious topics on risk maturity and risk tolerance I need to keep researching and writing about. I’ve been asked to develop a training on risk decision making. But a friend who has been like a brother and helped me a great deal died last week and I’d rather work on my laughter quotient.

How you can pray for the Taliban if they ever choose to detain Anna Hampton:

• “I’m not afraid of them, only what happens if they don’t give me coffee.”

• “Telling a woman to calm down works as well as baptizing a cat.”

• “There are two rules in life. Never give out all the information.”

• “I’m fragile. Not like a flower. Like a bomb.”

• ”Coffunkle: When one is in a funk due to lack of coffee.”

• “Underestimate me. That will be fun.” (Muslim men in general tend to underestimate women….)

• “If I’m ever murdered, it’s because I said something funny to someone with no sense of humor.”

• “Mr. Rogers never prepared me for the people in my neighborhood.”

• “5’3” but my attitude is 6’7”.” (Make sure the FBI social worker knows the following if I survive. Shoe: 7.5, Weight: 120 lbs +- 15

  Eyes: 1.75 readers 2024)

• “My level of sarcasm depends on your stupidity.” (The Taliban are not the smartest IQ, although they should not be underestimated.)

• “Laughter is the best medicine, unless you have diarrhea.”

• ”Attitude is the difference between an ordeal and an adventure.”

• ”Well, apparently, rock bottom has a basement.”

• “I’m (Anna) on my second guardian angel. My first one quit and is in therapy.” (Pray for my guardian angels. I have more than one. They aren’t Southern Baptists, either).

• “Tough times never last, but tough people do.”

• “Due to the confidentiality of my job, I don’t know what I am doing.”

• “I wonder what my job description says today.”

• “You come from dust. You return to dust. That’s why I don’t dust. It could be someone I know.”

• “Sweet old lady? More like battle-tested warrior queen.”

• “If we are in a ‘Don’t Laugh’ situation, don’t look at me.”

• “If you see me talking to myself, just move along. We are having a team meeting.”

• “Just remember, amateurs built the ark, professionals built the Titanic.”

• “Just remember if we get caught, you’re deaf and I don’t speak English (or Dari).”

• “Be careful when you blindly follow the masses. Sometimes the “M” is silent.”

In case the FBI read this, and want to know what I’m thinking, just know that:

• “You need only two tools in life. WD-40 and Duct tape. WD-40 if it’s stuck and should move, and Duct tape if it moves and shouldn’t.”

• “I asked myself if I was crazy and we all said no.”

• “I need to teach my facial expressions to use their inside voice.” (This is what will get me killed.)

• “The more you weigh, the harder you are to kidnap. Stay safe. Eat cake.” (I don’t honestly know how I can survive kidnapping or extremist detainment without coffee and chocolate.)

• “Maintaining a positive attitude will not solve all your problems, but it will annoy enough people to make it worth your while.”

• “Laughter is like windshield wipers. They don’t stop the rain, but help us keep going.”

• “The same boiling water that softens the potato hardens the egg. It’s about what you’re made of, not the circumstances.”

• “Grandma once said, ‘Sometimes you have to hug the people you don’t like so you know how big to dig the hole in the backyard.”

• “I’m pretty confident my last words will be, “Well shit, that didn’t work.”

• “Medical experts: 42 cups of coffee in one sitting will kill you. Me: So 41 cups is okay?”

• “Don’t piss off old people. The older we get, the less ‘life in prison’ is a deterrent.”

• (Thinking about the Taliban or extremists in general:) “No, You’re right, let’s do it the dumbest way possible because it’s easier for you.”

• “I’ve never been held hostage before, but I have been in group texts.”

• “Pretty sure I seized the wrong day.”

• “I don’t want to adult anymore. I don’t even want to human. I want to goat. I want to head butt anyone who annoys me.”

• “I lost my car lipstick and now my purse lipstick is in my room and my room lipstick is in my car and my whole life is just messed up.”
  

I wish my friend, Jim Law, was still alive. I already miss him. I remember the first time we met. He traveled all the way to Minneapolis for a training we were giving on risk decision making and security. He mentioned a particular kombucha drink he liked. I made sure my husband and I went out of our way to get him the drink and bring it the 2nd day…to a man I had only just met. But he had a loveable endearing way about him...

I don’t understand why God allowed him to die and not other difficult people in my life. Jim was helping me on two risk projects and was like the brother I don’t have despite having 2 biological brothers still alive.

I miss his “happy-go-lucky-smile” even though we were talking about deadly serious things related to missionaries going to dangerous places. He had called me recently to consult about a security situation that also involved spiritual warfare. He was a learner, he was humble. I can’t imagine the hole he has left in his organization and his family. He was far too young to die and important to global missions.

I have bitterness these days in my mouth, even though I know he is enjoying the experience of the full presence of Jesus…I wish I could join him and hope he has met my mother. I’m so sad for his family, his organization, and all those he touched in this life.

My condolences.